How to get along with your American Roommates

Getting along with roommates is a difficult task sometimes, especially when you have different interests, cultural backgrounds, and lifestyles. It is really important for you to connect with your roommates before moving in to talk about everyone’s living expectations.

What to do before moving in:

Usually, a few weeks before moving in, your leasing office or your landlord will share with you the information about your roommates. It can be their name, email addresses, and phone numbers. If you don’t have an international phone plan, I would recommend emailing your roommates so you don’t spend a lot of money trying to contact them.

In the email, introduce yourself, say how long you will be in the United States for, what you will study there, and you can also share some fun facts about yourself. I would also share things about your lifestyle and how social you are. For instance, if you love to wake up early to go to the gym, you can say that in your email. I had one roommate who loved to wake up at 5 am to go to some gym classes, for instance. It was not bothering me, but it is good to know.

I would also recommend talking about a set of rules in your first email. Don’t be too tough right away, but say something along the lines of “it would be great if we established some sort of rules or guidelines so we can have the best experiences living together.” You won’t be the only one fixing the rules, so stay open-minded.

What to do after moving in

Your roommates can really make or break your experience in the United States. They don’t have to be your best friends, but it is important to be somewhat cordial with them. If you have been able to establish a set of rules before you have moved in, now comes the testing phase. Sometimes, the rules you have set won’t stand because they actually don’t work, and that’s okay as long as everyone feels good about the broken rules.

Set up time to connect with your roommates, for instance, you can all go out to eat dinner somewhere, or you can all cook together. You must get to know them at least a little. For example, some of my roommates and I cooked dinner together a few times during the year we were living together, and it made living with them better.

If something happens that makes you feel uncomfortable, you have to say something right away, because people won’t know that something is bothering you if you don’t say anything. For instance, I was living with a girl who always had her boyfriend over, and he was even at our apartment when she wasn’t. I didn’t say something quickly enough, and by the time he had gotten too used to being in our apartment, I felt like I couldn’t say anything anymore, so don’t make the same mistakes I did.

Make some sorts of cleaning schedule so the same person doesn’t end up doing all of the chores. Cleanliness is quickly a topic that becomes sensitive because people have different habits linked to cleaning. Living with people from different cultures and backgrounds will sometimes test your limits. During the first week after everyone has moved in, you should all talk about a weekly cleaning schedule to know who will vacuum the common areas’ floors, who will empty the trash and the dishwasher, and so on.

Overall, living with roommates can be a bit complicated at times, even if you live with amazing people. If you do some of the tips from this article, you can save yourself a lot of headaches, coming from someone who lived in 3 different apartments with both international and American roommates.